Implosion

I found out, this evening, that my mother's side of the family is actually pretty big.  I suppose that's only to be expected, considering that my granddad was the oldest of many kids; however, I have met only a couple of my mother's cousins.

Imagine my surprise when, this evening, one of my distant cousins contacts me through Facebook to invite me to the family reunion, mentioning that she didn't know how to get in contact with my grandad's kids, or grandkids.  My mother, aunts, and cousins (my late uncle's kids--my aunts never had any...thank God). 

I have not only never met this person, but never even heard of this person.  Nor have I heard much about her mother or grandmother--my mom's cousins. 

And then, it strikes me.  My mother and aunts are isolated from my grandad's family.  I'm not entirely sure if it's by their own choices, or by my late grandmother's choices.  At least, initially.  Now, it's all on them.

My mother, younger full sister, and my aunts just keep drawing in on themselves, not trying to stay in contact with my late uncle's sons, not trying to stay in contact with anyone outside their immediate circle. 

I sometimes wonder if they'd stay in contact with me, if I weren't so insistent on making sure my kids got to know my family.

And every year, my family's circle of acquaintances gets smaller and smaller, as people they know either die off, or quit talking to them. 

And every year, I see my mother's family--my family--come a little closer to imploding under the weight of their own strangeness and age.