Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Adulthood vs. childhood

I've got about a dozen books I want to read. I've got a few Simon Green books that I've had on my list for a while, four by Larry Correia, and two by David Weber. I also have the second in Rothfuss's Kingkiller Chronicles. And those are just the ones we have. I want to dive into a book as soon as I wake up, and not come out until the book is finished, then dive into the next. I think, were I to do this, I'd have my reading list knocked out in, oh, about a week (given that I can devour two to three novels in a day, if I do nothing else but read--I used to do that all the time).

I want, very badly, to go shooting. I want to load up a ton of ammo, my two favorite rifles, and that lovely little .22 Winchester that someone so defiled (filed the front sight off, but put a 3/4 inch by three inch long rail for a scope that I had to put a holographic red dot sight on) and go play. I've done my work, now it's Christmas break, and time to play. Right? Right.

Only, I have a three year old son and a one year old daughter who's just gotten over a virus. Both need constant supervision, and care, and for Mommy to get in the floor and play with them and read to them. I have a house to continue to catch up on cleaning. I have Christmas baskets to assemble, cookies and meals to cook. I may be done with what I get paid to do, but I still have responsibilities that I have to keep up with. I'm an adult, and that's what adults do.

I want to go out and get about a dozen more books that I've had on my mental list for a while, and one of those CZ 527s I had an opportunity to handle before my son learned to walk. I want to remodel my kitchen, my hall bathroom, and my back room. I want to take the (sagging, splintering, and generally unsafe and ugly) deck off of the back of the house and replace it with a nice patio, and maybe an arbor to train flowers up over for shade for a bench. I want about four or five new bookcases, all solid wood, not cheap knock-together crap from Walmart.

Only, right now, we're treading water. Currently, mine is the main monthly income, and it's just enough to get by on, and that only with help from our savings account. We've cut expenses nearly as far as we can, and I can't think of anything much else we can cut. We can't afford to buy more books, or guns, or do anything but basic repairs and maintenance to the house. So, we pinch pennies, spend as little as possible, and that on things we need, while making plans for what we want when we can afford it, after we've gotten our retirement accounts and kids' college funds fully funded. I'm an adult. That's what adults do.

Sadly, Odysseus and I are two adults in a nation of children. I have, maybe, two other friends that I'd classify as "adults"--they take care of needs, first, then wants with any money they have left, and don't overspend much or often. They take care of their responsibilities and their kids before they take care of themselves. The saddest part of this is that I have about a dozen people I'd call a friend, in real life, and only two that I classify as adults. Not a good proportion, but an accurate representation of the level of maturity this country's citizens tend to have.

No, it's not "fair" that we can't do what we want, when we want, or buy everything we want when we want it. Then again, "fair" is a concept for playgrounds and classrooms, not one that applies in the adult world.

Every attempt to make it apply where it doesn't has either started with or ended in tyranny.


  1. Nope, life isn't fair. I think most of us just try to get by the best we can. It's upsetting to me too when certain adults in my life act like children (you know I'm surrounded by them!). But most of the time I feel like there's nothing I can do because I'm outnumbered, outvoted, and trying like hell to make my island function (even though there's those I wish I could vote off my island and send packing; not because I don't love them, but things only stretch so far).

    Meanwhile, things I do to try to protect those I love and prepare for the worst possible future I have to do in secret...otherwise, I'd be told I'm being paranoid.

    Paranoid? Probably. But just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean there isn't a new baby dictator in North Kirea just begging for an excuse to end the USA....

  2. You ain't a-kiddin', dearie. And you can't call it paranoia when prepping lets you keep eating when the money dries up.

  3. Hey 'kids', I hate to tell you, but life's a bitch 90% of the time......

  4. I know that, and she's learning that, dude. It's a hard, painful lesson, and learning to accept it is one of the hallmarks of adulthood.


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