I've had several acquaintances with chronic health issues. Some have been my students, some are my friends. One or two have been friends who are college students.
Out of all of them, only one has blamed the health issues (rather minor, all things considered) for having to drop out of college. All things considered, yes, hypertension combined with Chrohns and type II diabetes isn't a fun set of conditions to deal with, but they can be controlled.
All it takes is a willingness make the choice to grow the fuck up and do what must be done to control the chronic issues. And no, the individual (whom I dearly love) isn't willing to do that. His wife tries to help by serving food that won't exacerbate his conditions, but he'd rather go get fast food that drives up his blood sugar and irritates his digestion, but tastes "good" (even though he isn't willing to even try the things his wife makes).
It isn't his health responsible for making him drop out: it's a severe lack of maturity and drive, combined with a probable fear that even if he does get his degree, nothing's going to change for him and his family. And then, he'd count himself a failure.
This is one of those things I can't do anything about. I'm not stressed over it, but I'm still shaking my head in absolute bewilderment at the way my friend is approaching and handling things. I see what he could do to be able to get what he wants. I see his path. Why in the world is he unable to?
12 minutes ago
Some people are 'determined' to fulfill that 'self-fulfilling failure prophecy'... His drive to fail is stronger than his drive to succeed...
ReplyDeleteI've also never seen the guy defer gratification, either. He's in his mid-forties going on mid-toddler in his impulse control.
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