Monday, April 21, 2014

consequences

Imp [whining]: Momma, I want a drink.

Me: Stop whining, and eat your supper.

Imp [still whining]: Momma, I want a drink.

Me: You have a cup of chocolate milk in the fridge that you can have after you eat your supper.  The sooner you stop whining and eat, the sooner you can have it.

(a couple of minutes pass)

Imp [still whining]: Momma, I want a napkin.

Me: No.  Now stop whining, and eat.  You have three more chances.  If you don't stop whining, you will be spending the entire evening alone in your room, and you won't be allowed to watch anything later.

(a couple of minutes pass)

Imp [still whining]: Momma, I gotta poop.

Me: You went just before supper.  Stop whining and eat.

Imp [still whining]: Momma, I gotta pee.

Me: No.  Last chance, son.  Stop whining, and eat.

Imp [whining with the addition of crocodile tears]: Momma, I want a drink!

Me: I warned you.  You will be spending the evening by yourself in your room.

Of course, that was followed up by genuine tears, and a promise that he'd stopped, and that he'd eat his supper, and that he'd be good, but...too late.  He's going to be going to his room as soon as he's done in the bathroom, and he'll not be coming out until it's time to brush teeth, then go to bed. 

I witnessed, during my office hours two weeks ago, the results of not placing and enforcing consequences: a whole flood of students who'd not turned in work on time bugging the communications computer lab tech about why couldn't they see their assignments to turn in two months ago, and could they still make that up, and could he fix things for them. 

That wasn't all I saw: I saw a grown man, in his thirties or forties, throw a fit at the nice Vietnamese lady who makes Starbucks' black coffee taste good because they'd run out of the blueberry scones in the case.  And when I say throw a fit, I mean screaming, red-faced, stomping, slapping his hands down on the counter, making everybody stare at him fit.  And no, I don't think he was special needs, just spoiled.

Both of those things could have been avoided by these individuals running up against firmly enforced, clear, fair consequences for poor choices and bad behavior in their childhood. 

10 comments:

  1. Oh yes, this so much. I get so tired of seeing the 35 year old 2 year olds.

    Parenting: you're doing it right.

    (I remember being sent to my room for whining over stuff. Didn't hurt me at all, and in fact, in the long term it did me good.)

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    1. He never. stopped. WHINING. "But I wanna come out!" "Momma, I wanna watch something!"

      The instance above happened around five CDT. It's now eight, and he's been sent to bed. He's STILL whining, only now about being sent to bed without me having changed the batteries in his beloved light turtle (sorta like a dream light stuffed animal, but more light, less stuffed).

      I'd have a drink, but my head already hurts.

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    2. I hate that kind of behavior, a grown man working off his rage on a woman. The last time I intervened in someone having a temper tantrum at a female clerk, I got stabbed in the leg. That was because I was stupid and got too close to the guy as he was laying on the floor after I beat his ass. Ah, to be young again. It was worth it though, because my buddy then proved that the metal toe caps on a Texan's cowboy boots can indeed leave wedge shaped indentations in a malefactor's face. It may not be enough to get me past Saint Peter, but I have done a few good things in my life. Not many.....

      You're right to discipline your son. I'm glad you don't beat him though, I think there are better ways.

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    3. Spanks are reserved for egregious bad behavior (as in: repeated acts despite correction) or behavior that could hurt him or someone else. I don't spank when I'm frustrated and angry.

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  2. Gen X and no responsibility for their actions... Somebody should have bitch slapped that asshole into next week. Just sayin...

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    1. I was about half his size, and I nearly went over to tell him off. What kept me from it is the knowledge that I likely would have gotten fired for intervening instead of calling security. And we're still dependent on my job there for more reasons than one.

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    2. I'm glad you didn't. People that act that way can go violent in a split second, and since they have no honor they'll hurt women. Some man should have stepped up to the plate.

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    3. There. Wasn't. One. I was the closest there was to one--the nitwits standing around with a Y chromosome were all metrosexual.

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    4. I understand HH, but it is still wrong... And I feel for the lady that had to stand there and take the abuse.

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    5. Very much so. She's such a sweet lady, and has the typical Oriental reaction to stress: she stood there wringing her hands, tears in her eyes, with a wide, uncomfortable smile, bobbing nods that were almost bows. I really wish that sucker screaming at her the worst luck in the world for the rest of his life.

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