You know, I was never one of those kids that took the magnifying glass outside and focused it on ant hills. I thought it was cruel.
I begin to understand and sympathize with the sadistic little bastards that do, now.
(Warning: LOTS of F-bombs below the fold)
I fucking HATE those fucking tiny little, black fucking ants that you JUST CAN'T FUCKING KEEP THE FUCKING FUCKETY FUCK OUT OF THE FUCKING HOUSE!!! We've sprayed, and sprayed, and fucking sprayed around the foundation, and around the fucking windows, and around everywhere we FUCKING SEE THE LITTLE FUCKERS, AND WE STILL FUCKING CAN'T FUCKING KEEP THEM OUT OF THE FUCKING HOUSE!!!
I do my best to keep food up off the floor, and off the counters. Currently, they're being attracted to a few places: the cat's food (which we can't spray near, because while she's the most worthless cat in the world, we love her anyway), where the cat's been crapping on the floor, where the toddlers drop food where I can't fucking reach, even with the wand extender on the vacuum hose (behind the couch, down the vents, etc), and, weirdest of all, the imp's diaper genie.
So, ants. Ants can fuck off. With FUCKING BURNING FUCKING sun lasers focused through fucking magnifying glasses held in the sweaty hands of sadistic little bastards giggling as they send the fucking little fucking pests up in fucking teeny-tiny fucking puffs of fucking smoke.
I'm really beginning to fucking hate squirrels, too. We find where they've fucking chewed through the eaves to get into the attic, repair those spots, and the next FUCKING week, those fucking little fucking buck-fucking-toothed fucking rodents have fucking chewed through another fucking spot in the fucking eaves. And then start fucking chewing on the fucking house in the fucking attic.
So, squirrels. Squirrels can fuck right the fucking fuckety fuck off. I fucking wish to God I lived outside city limits so I could start fucking thinning out the fucking population of those fucking fuzzy fucking buck-fucking-toothed fucking rats. I hate to even fucking imagine the fucking damage they're fucking doing to my fucking house.
Fucking politicians don't fucking piss me the fuck off nearly as fucking bad as those two fucking types of fucking pests.
5 hours ago
Got a good booyah for squirrel I've adapted from my uncles Muscrat Booyah. A nice pellet gun would take care of your critters and fill the crock pot at the same time! :)
ReplyDeleteI will use cinnamon as an an deterrent!
Deletehttp://www.ehow.com/how_4464941_repel-ants-cinnamon.html
Bill, I actually looked into it--pellet guns are also illegal inside city limits, here.
DeleteOCM--I'll have to try that.
Cayenne will also work for the squirrels.
DeleteFor the ants, we also have issues with sugar ants. Amdro gel seems to work well for us.
DaddyBear, does Boo still put everything in his mouth? Our pixie does--we are hesitant to spread anything that might be toxic if ingested.
DeleteWhat do you do with cayenne for squirrels? Make up little sachets and hit the squirrels with them? How/where do you apply it to keep the little fuckers out
HH, damn the laws. Air guns are whisper quiet. Just set up a sniper hide with a good backstop. Where do you live, Chicago?
ReplyDeleteNo, we live about five or six blocks from local town PD--and they regularly stop on our block to pull over and sit in the car to fill out paperwork.
DeleteYou can put the cat food bowl into a shallow baking pan of water. Ants won't cross the water. That's how I dealt with it here. Rat traps for the squirrels might work.
ReplyDeleteRat traps are tempting...maybe tied to a string so we could retrieve the dead tree rat after it went off.
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