Distinction without a difference

I was talking to my mom, recently. She was complaining about her treatment in my home town, and how it's everybody's fault but hers.

(In a lot of ways, it reminded me of the delinquents and hippies doing the "Occupy" thing in various cities.)

In any case, I offered a couple of solutions (she could move, she could shop in about four different nearby towns, she could volunteer to let people get to know her and prove that the rumors she thinks are being passed around are false). She apparently doesn't want to solve the problem, just complain about it. She says she doesn't have the inner strength to do anything about it anymore.

"So, you've just let them beat you," I said.

"No, I quit fighting."

"You surrendered. You lost. You let them beat you."

"No, I just got tired of it and quit fighting."

Frankly, I don't understand the mindset behind that. Life, all of it, is a fight. If you quit struggling to keep going, you've lost. You've lost your momentum, you've lost the ability to do more than survive, you've lost any respect anyone had for you, not to mention any respect you had for yourself.

It isn't any wonder that she's so depressed.